october ; two

im only here for one thing

a fucking rant about fucking toppdogg!!!

there used to be THIRTEEN members

FUCKING THIRTEEN

and now theres SIX FUCKING MEMBERS

SIX. THATS, LIKE, SEVEN PEOPLE THAT LEFT???

and most of them were my favs,, like nakta (who only recently has decided to leave to pursue a career in, like, electronic music), hansol (my all time fucking bias) and jenissi (such a fucking cutie, and such a good rapper).

now theres only bjoo and sangdo whom i luv with all my heart!! yano comes in a close second, and so does xero (he's so goddamn handsome). atom, that broccoli boi, is on hiatus n shit, and im still getting into hojoon (he was the hardest person to remember the name of since he was so quiet. he makes a really cute girl tho haha).

i only got into them like six months ago, from watching all their reality shows, so although jenissi wasn't in the group at that point, i still saw him a lot and really liked him!!

kido n gohn n seogoong were already gone by the time all kill and toppdogg project came out, so i still haven't learned much about them yet!!!

BUT IT PISSES ME OFF BECAUSE they were the ones that got me into kpop!! they were so cute, so fucking funny, i laughed my head off when watching them. so underrated, and now that so many members are leaving, they'll get even more unpopular :-( hopefully atom's part in produce 101 will bring some fans, too :-))

man, im just so sad. i was hella devastated when i saw that hansol was leaving, and now nakta and pgoon too??? who's gonna be the leader???

im so sad :-((( i loved toppdogg but now that everyones leaving, i feel like it'll really fall apart.

see you later, alligator.

in a while, crocodile. 

october ; one

!!!!!! hello hello!!!

i've moved!!! it's not as bad as i thought it would be, though it is not incredible either.

i'm writing a book!!! i say that , but it is a joke. i am writing something, but it's shit and won't go anywhere at all.

i love all of you!!! and i love ethan and hila from h3h3 they are so beautiful

i honestly have like zero interest in most things now,,,

ethan and hila + frankjavcee are the only youtubers i really watch,, plus the occasional filthyfrank or idubbbz.

i play a lot of nintendo games!! im such a nerd holy shit

pokemon moon + professor layton + animal crossing have been taking up my days,,

ive only played pokemon moon for like, what, thirty five hours??? im not very far haha

but it's really fun and im really into it!!!

professor layton, on the other hand, since it has a set story line and shit, ive usually played for like ten to twenty hours and then it's over.

i've finished, like, five of them and they're super fun holy shit!!! im currently replaying miracle mask which was one of my favorites as it was the first one i beat

im also not far in animal crossing!! ive had it for over four years (fucking rip me) and ive legit only played it for like one hundred fifty hours. how disgraceful, i know :''((

thats basically all thats happening in my life!! hmu if u wanna play animal crossing w/ me or something, i could always use the company. :-))

see you later, alligator!!!!

in a while, crocodile!!!!

july ; twenty eight

// what i listened to as i wrote this //

+

yeah, i forgot as usual. whatever.

i'm moving in two days. not really excited. kinda nervous. oh man i'm hella screwed.

managed to get rid of a lot of shit. kinda miss the clutter (really miss the clutter).

my birthday was two days ago! also very lowkey. didn't even celebrate, rip. it gets less exciting as i grow up.

got way into filthy frank. i like his shit. it's the closest thing i get to almost puking while watching youtube. pretty fun though, i gotta admit. his music is real nice. so nice. like, even his pink season shit is really good? especially the prophecy music, i love the first one [the getter remix version of fried noodles].

and when he's joji, that's so absolutely nice. i cry when i listen to world$tarmoney.

been reading a lot of manga shit! (no, i'm not a weeb shut up). stuff online. really only yaoi, 'cause i'm a fucking nerd. manhwas are also really fucking lit, though i've already read most of the ones online that are actually decent.

that's all from me!

wish me luck in a new world.

see you later, alligator.

in a while, crocodile.

july ; tenth

okay okay okay i'm not dead !!

just lazy as fuck :))

june ; thirty

// what i listened to as i wrote this //

+

oHO uh no what i didn't forget yesterday to update what????????

okay i am sorry i was too lazy ,, but hey i'm updating today so that counts as my blog still going , right????? please ?????????????????

well anyway hELLO! i'm really energetic for some reason right now, though i should sleep soon. or not. [the internet is all i need].

i've been also feeling quite happy lately, which is quite nice actually! i've been keeping up with internet friends (which i'm usually really bad at) so it's nice to speak with them every once in a while. plus, i'm skyping one of them tomorrow! we have hUGE timezone differences, so this is really nice :]

moving on! so, the house i'm currently living in has to be, like, spotless in around a week or two, which is extremely stressful because my whole family are just naturally messy people (except my mom) and naturally very lazy (except my mom again). and considering she's away right now for work, all i can say is that we are very fucked. my room literally looks like a fucking tornado came through it.

plus, i'm really bad at throwing things out. when i used to play animal crossing (i still have the game, mind you, i'm just scared to see my horrible hair and the weeds (nOT THE WEEDS)) i'd literally never sell anything that could mean the tiniest thing to me. a frog shirt? kEEP. a melon hat? fUCKING KEEP. a pair of samurai shoes? nO WAY IN HELL I'D SELL THOSE. a tank top rose shirt and a short sleeved rose shirt? kEEP THAT SHIT. so, basically, my town would be overgrown with weeds and random clothing was littered everywhere. needless to say, my town was pretty bad.

don't worry, i got over it. now my town is clean and great and i got lots of money from selling all those useless clothing items. it was a win-win. life was great.

unfortunately, i can't do the same with my real life. i have a lot of useless shit. so much useless shit. but iTS REAL. i can't just toss those items away forever, can i?

i suppose i'll figure something out. wish me luck!

hm, i can't think of anything else to talk about, so goodbye for now! i'll (try to) post tomorrow (though no one even cares lmao what) !!

see you later, alligator.

in a while, crocodile.

june ; twenty eight

// what i listened to as i wrote this //

+

hello again! i've kept posting for two days now, so i'd say i'm doing pretty good, huh? who knows, hah.

my life is actually quite boring now. i swim in the mornings, run in the evenings (or swim again) and that's basically all i do. i eat food and sit on my phone. so interesting, huh?

i've found that in this post and in my last post i've had a word that i just repeat a lot. in the last post, it was the word well. in this post, it's probably going to be huh. 'cause i've already used it twice.

my life used to be entertaining. all my buds are at a camp or away on vacation, and i'm just here, bored out of my mind, doing absolutely nothing.

it rained today, and now the roads are slick with water. hopefully no one gets in a crash, but even when the roads aren't wet, shit happens. so there'll probably be a crash today.

i've also been watching riverdale lately, and i gotta say it's pretty interesting. quite cliche, but cole sprouse makes up for any problems the show produced. he's pretty cool, and i absolutely love his twitter, and his instagram (well, not his main instagram, but the one i really like).

and oh no, i just spent an hour on his twitter. help me. i love him so much.

that's basically all that's happened in my life.

stay cool, yo.

see you later alligator.

in a while, crocodile. 

june ; twenty seven

// what i listened to when i wrote this //

+

alright, i'll spill the beans.

this isn't my first time making a post on this shitty failure of a blog. and that's the truth. this blog's been on the internet for, what, a year?

oh, nevermind, i just checked. says my first post was in september of 2016. well, i was close enough.

i'm also hoping that this won't be my last post to this blog, but who am i kidding? i've said this before. and i've failed this before. let's just hope it lasts longer than before. which was like two weeks. i mean, i posted for four days straight and then posted a week and a half later. does that count as it lasting for two weeks? or only four days? questions, man. well, even if it is two weeks, it shouldn't be that hard. right?

i feel like i'm rushing this writing but who am i to know? it's only my first post.

well, i've been working on my ukulele-ing, and i even wrote a tidbit of a song! probably not going to become anything spectacular, though. the lyrics are very cliche, but the tune's nice enough.

i got out of school a couple of weeks ago and it's been pretty boring. summer is so overrated. maybe it's nice having freedom, but i like the constant security of school, though sometimes that can be shit too. it's peaceful, i suppose, but there's this big cloud hanging over me at all times. it's mostly from the huge fact that in less than a month i'm moving far away from where i've lived my whole life.

i mean, not super far away. like, it's around 2,000 miles away? far enough that i'll feel incredibly lonely and scared. it's really nerve-racking, you know? i've been acting all tough and fearless but holy shit i am terrified. a new school and everything!

though i'm also totally excited. it's a new chance. i can be different! though i'll probably stay the same. it's hard to change habits.

what else? hm, i've been watching a lot of youtube lately. i really enjoy getting into that spot on youtube where everywhere you click there'll just be more and more memes, as far as the eye can see. though i waste a lot of time that way, lemme tell you.

i recently broke up with my girlfriend, and i've taken it easier than i expected i would. it was a mutual agreement between us, and maybe it was easier because it was over internet, but i still thought i'd feel sad a little bit. and maybe i do? a tiny part of me? but we barely talked anyway, so what was the use of it all?

sorry for pushing my shitty ass problems on you, but i feel goddamn tired. holy crap i wanna sleep.

anything else? uh, i've been really appreciating the art of lofi hip hop lately. it's a real great genre of music that i wish was more popular 'cause it's really nice. it's good for writing, which i do a lot.

man i'm so boring.

summer is so boring.

i actually knew this girl named summer, a while back. we didn't really know eachother, but we argued a bit once about the meaning of emo. i, personally, think i won, but she probably doesn't think the same way, of course. i was arguing that she wasn't emo. she was arguing that she was. i dunno? it was a stupid fight.

she was the girlfriend of one of my best internet friends, though we don't talk at all anymore. i kinda miss them.

i think that's all for now! sorry for this shitty first post. i'll try to tone it down a bit in the future (if there is one)

see you later, alligator.

in a while, crocodile.